Beams of Love

“We are here to learn to endure the beams of love.” – William Blake

I read that this morning and it made me think about a lot of different things. We are here to LEARN TO ENDURE love. I think it made me think of all of my trust issues the most. I have trust issues with people and with God.

I looked up the word endure in the dictionary (yes, I am a nerd). Anyway, it means to accept, sometimes with hardship. I relate to the hardship part.

Why is it so hard to accept love? I think for me, its hard to believe I deserve it from people. I don’t understand WHY someone would love me. I know there are reasons. However, I don’t deserve it from God. He knows my insides and how ugly they can be. Theres nothing I can do to earn His love. It’s a free gift. That’s hard to accept. Why, I don’t know. I read a story in the Raggamuffin’s Gospel about a kid who knocked on a friends door and when the door was opened, he asked “where are the cookies”. He wanted a free gift and accepted it without thinking. I think we have to learn to be like little kids with God.

Mat 18:1 At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" 2 And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them 3 and said, "Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 "Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, 6 but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.

Kids accept love, from their parents and anyone else willing to hand it out. They trust. They love back. That’s what we have to do. Its hard because we grow up and realize that the world is a tough place to live. We learn about hurt. So we have to re-learn to allow ourselves to be loved. Its definitely something I need to work on.