Ache

Im hurting.
I dont know why, but I'll show you.
Loveless, restless, wincing as my muscles constrict to the point I lay dying alone for no reason.

My bones crack when I move.
Why does that happen? I feel ancient and oblivious to the fact that I am the
solitary soul that
hears my bones.

My mind has taken total control of my physical being.
I feel the way I feel.
My brain has told the rest of me to
give itself over.
I have been hijacked by myself.

Stabbing. Thats what it feels like.
I toss and turn and breathe harder and harder until my cat meows at me
and I realize he thinks Im the one thats obnoxious.

Hollow and bound, starved and wretched, dry.
It gives me a reason to pray.
I scream out,
call out,
die out.

I have no disease.
I have no disease.
Take this disease.
Take it from me.
clenching my hands, biting my lips, locking my jaws
to try to reason with it.

It stays, conquers me, overcomes my senses,
my mental attributes ran away. My physical self
drowns in the pain.

I cant sleep.
I cant fucking sleep.