Why do we take meds?
Why do we take meds? To make us conform to the world we live in? To make us “like everyone else?” To keep us alive?
Many people who are mentally ill don’t like the fact that that’s what they are. Don’t get me wrong, we do not have to conform to the mentally ill standard of living either…we don’t HAVE to take meds, we don’t HAVE to go to the doctor, we don’t HAVE to do anything but exist, and to be honest, we don’t HAVE to do that.
I want to talk about those of us who have delusions…those of grandeur, those of supernatural powers…and those of us who have hallucinations. Why would someone who has friends when they hallucinate, who thinks they are God, who has delusions that they have supernatural powers….why in the world would those people take meds to suppress those things?...especially when those symptoms are mild. I think I am really asking that question. I am not sure I have an answer to it.
I feel smarter without meds, I am more creative without meds, I feel more without meds, I felt more alive without meds….however, I was more depressed more often without them and I could border on out of control with cutting myself, I also could not be in groups of people, and I had uncontrollable shakes at times. Those are reasons why I take medication…not because anyone else wants me to be “controlled” but because I want to be. I want to be able to go to work, I want to be able to survive in groups of people, I want to live a life where I am in control of myself and my mind. The medication may numb me out, but I am coherent to myself if that makes any sense. I can control my actions most of the time….maybe not my words….and I still make mistakes like everyone else….but I am down with normalization in my own case.
Normalization –
1 : to make conform to or reduce to a norm or standard2 : to make normal (as by a transformation of variables)3 : to bring or restore (as relations between countries) to a normal condition
Normal –
1 : PERPENDICULAR; especially : perpendicular to a tangent at a point of tangency2 a : according with, constituting, or not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle b : conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern3 : occurring naturally <normal immunity>4 a : of, relating to, or characterized by average intelligence or development b : free from mental disorder : SANE
Sane-
1 : proceeding from a sound mind : RATIONAL2 : mentally sound; especially : able to anticipate and appraise the effect of one's actions3 : healthy in body
Of all of these, I think what I want to be is “able to anticipate and appraise the effects of one’s actions.” Sane.
Everyone is normal, as in occurring naturally, and I don’t like the definition of “free from mental disorder”…does that mean you can be normal if you have 5 eyeballs but you aren’t normal if you are schizophrenic? Someone should write Merriam Webster about that one.
ANYWAY, I guess my point is this: YOU choose what you ARE. You can choose to conform, you can choose to be sane, and you can choose to be completely out of your mind. That’s your business. I chose to take control of myself. I don’t like to be totally slammed about that fact either. It doesn’t make me a sell out, it doesn’t make me the victim of drug companies and doctors….its what I want. That may change. One day I may want to trade my rational mind for the creativity and what I THINK is brilliance when I am off my meds. The truth is this: I am not brilliant. It’s called a delusion. I am not God, I am Jil. I want to be rational. That’s why I am medicated. I choose to take meds because I want to live. I don’t think I would without them…and I may not with them, but I think I have a better chance of it by swallowing the 900000 pills to reduce my depression and my mania. I choose to take meds because I don’t like cutting and burning myself…..but that’s just me. I am up for the trade off right now….
What about you guys? I do not think any less of anyone for choosing not to take meds. That’s your choice. I am all about choice and freedom. I just think that whatever we decide to do, we must be willing to face the consequences: dullness, conformity, breaking the law, not being able to control yourself…whatever. I just am wondering why we choose to take meds and why we choose not to.
posted by Jil at 5:50 AM
9 Comments:
I as well would love to be med free - but I dont know if I can deal. Plus my peepeehead husband has threatened on more than one occasion to have me commited if I dont stay on them.... with 3 kids who are my life, I dont feel like I have much of a choice
9:01 AM
yeah, kshippychik hit it right on for me -- I'm on my meds because my partner will do terrible things to me if I go off them again. I know, not the best reason, but I guess you do what you have to do...
3:29 PM
Alex is one of the (I think the statistic is "less than 20%", wherever they get that number from) bipolars who, once diagnosed properly, has never had any problem whatsoever taking any medication he was prescribed--and let me tell you, it's been a lot. The side effects have sucked, and lithium tanked his thyroid, which we're now trying to get back by d/cing the lithium and adding synthroid...but the "flat affect" and feeling is something that went away after a while.
Even Kay Jamison said that if she could do it without harming herself or anyone else (including emotionally), she would choose to live manic every day of her life.
Alex is now as "normal" as anyone else--certainly as normal as me. Not that that's saying a lot. Whenever he does anything weird, he likes to say, "Well, I'm bipolar. What's YOUR excuse?"
He was also relieved to get the BP diagnosis. He was really glad that there was something "real" wrong with him, that could be treated. One of the saddest things he ever said to me right after the dx was, "I just always thought I was a jerk, not as good as other people."
Got to rambling, and not even sure what my point was, except I sympathize.
11:54 PM
kshippychic--just wanted to say that the "no meds, no marriage" is also part of our agreement, plus he agrees to listen to me if I say it's time to go to the pdoc for a "tweak" of his meds or something, because I see the "ramping up" coming before he does.
I don't know about your situation, but our agreement was made from sheer self-preservation and the need to protect my daughter. My husband has participated in highly risky, frightening behaviors when manic, so having him unmedicated is not a chance I can take. Still, it is HIS choice, just as it is my choice to leave if I have to. I'm glad he doesn't put me in that position.
11:58 PM
ALL THE COMMENTS THAT I READ ARE SO ON THE MONEY. BUT ITS TRUE, IF YOU COULD LIVE YOUR LIFE WITHOUT MEDS, "YOU".. WOULD BE THE ONLY COMPANY YOU WOULD KEEP HAPPY, BUT YOUR NOT EVEN SURE OF THAT. IT IS FRIGHTNING, HEART-RIPPING, DEPRESSINGLY HARD,SO OPTIMISTIC OF THE FUTURE,TO LOVE SOMEONE LIKE YOU; AND SO YOU CATCH YOURSELF ASKING, WHATS THE POINT? YOUR STARTING TO WONDER IF YOUR BIPOLAR?YOU KEEP SAYING, WHAT THE HELL, WHATS THE DIFFERENCE?? BUT YOU KNOW "WHATS" THE DIFFERENCE WOULD BE, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN THERE.
4:20 PM
I feel very sorry for you men, that would allow FILTH like these women to intimidate you into taking medications or they would leave you.
You deserve you life if you would be married to such evil, ignorant garbage.
When I finally decided that human beings were NEVER meant to have that filth and sewage in their bodies (and they are not despite what the ignorants say here) I made the decision that I had 2 choices.
To live naturally as I was intended, and to think well, or die.
Period.
You hear all these women talk about the Garden of Eden and all their other crap and they are the biggest hypocrites on the planet.
People were NEVER meant to take this crap in the beginning or any other time.
Medicine has its place, and only cults say that isnt the case. the place is temporarily, during critical times, or during intervention.
Any man that would be married to such evil that doesnt even trust him, and has to "protect" their daughter or marriage from him, is a coward and wimp and gutless moron that shouldnt even take breath.
23 yrs later after stopping the drug cocktails , that DONT work by the way, only in female delusional minds do they (they are proven not to work much better than not taking meds long term and this is FACT and I know tons of people that take meds and they NEVER worked for them)---23 yrs later, we are happily married and in love, with great kids, and no problems, but the difference was my wife isnt evil and knows I wont put up with threats, intimidation or any of that crap.
She is a 50/50 equal partner, treats me with respect as she knows I wont tolerate anything else, and I treat her with respect. We talk things out and she gently tells me when she sees that some injustice is upsetting me and she doesnt want to see something bad happen to me. (other pain and injustice are the things that set me off and landed me with problems and in the hospital because I couldnt cope with the misery around me and that I saw.
23 yrs without meds and not one problem and I had it worse than any of you.
I use mindfulness tapes and they WORK and people have used that for 2500 years. Yoga, massage, eating a Vegan Organic diet, instead of dead animmal body parts and Monsanto poisonb filth that causes birth defects in animals that drink from streams, and cancer in people, and all sorts of other problems, is the way to go.
Buy healing music tapes in the store. They are called that. Have a CD player and Radio Shack portable speakers and keep them wherever you go. I promise it works. (these speakers are fold up, tiny, and attach to any portable $20 CD player)
One isnt enough. Have the in every room. Im telling you it works. It saved my life.
If you only saw the toxic profile and risks of Lithium Carbonate, you would be appalled. (I have the info in EXTREME detail from scientists who have studied it in top universities and dont mind posting it here) and the same thing for Depakote , and the rest. They dont work. People who think so are fools.
These other things and something called LOVE and SUPPORT and laying it on the line---that this is what will be , or else, does the job.
My wife never threatened me because when she said forever, unlike these women, she meant it. Im the one that threatened myself, and knew, I HAD @ CHOICES: THINK WELL, WALK THE WALK, DESPITE ALL THE MISERY AROUND ME THAT CAUSED ME INABILITY TO COPE---OR DIE!
You have 2 choices---think well, get in the drivers seat, take control over your life, OR DIE!
Anyone who would want to live a life filled with filth and poison they were never meant to have and that destroys their insides and souls, is a MORON and deserves every single thing they get. They are cowards.
I had it worse than anyone on here, and I one day had enough, and realized either live your life the way you were meant to, do the things necessary to relax you when you get stressed, or kill yourself, because you will not be able to contribute the beauty, love, and happiness you were meant to give to others.
I let others do what they want, but I was so disgusted and offended by the "threats" and these type of women that I had to say something. They dont even deserve a husband. What decent man would marry such women.
Kay has lost 3 husbands and I think its because in her book, she LIES, and tells everyone else how 'hopeless" bipolar relationships are, while in the meantime she was married and everything is fine.
She deserved every single thing she got because she took hope from people and planted doubt in relationships.
So help me God, I know of several long term relationships with guys and gals with bipolar (one of them having it) where they are married, madly in love, the kids and pets are great, and life is good. We are one of them.
Do what YOU want but stop telling others something that is a LIE and not natural and was never meant to begin with. I wouldnt be surprised if this post was censored since it doesnt conform to the accepted garbage from the capitalistic ignorant doctor garbage that exists in this country, that knows NOTHING and thinks they know something, and often everything.
These are the worst doctors in the world in this country, in it for the wrong reasons, and clueless. Several of my top friends were doctors, from top schools, till I heard how they stigmatized people with bipolar and such. they didnt know I was bipolare and assumed I shared their evil prejudices.
They treat these people like they are dogs below them and with condescension and contempt. People arent "consumers"---they are people!
The best doctors are the ones in rural countries that listen to their patients, are in it for the right reasons (not greed like these kids and people), know people are their own best doctors, and show love, kindness, compassion, empathy and know how to communicate. ANYONE who thinks this country's medical system is the best is not only dumb, they should be locked up. We were #9 in mortality even amongst the big industrialized countries the last I looked.
And forget it compared to people living the right way, with less stress, love, peace, amongst beauty and animals, on hillsides.
My doctor came from one of those places and is the only good doctor I ever had. The female doctors I had were drivel, vicious, mean, dominating, condescending and EVIL and the make guys werent much better.
Anyone who tells you that you cant change it without meds, and live happy with a beautiful relationship and a wonderful girl deserves the worst massive bad Karma on this earth because they are lying to you.
Take my suggestions above, and WATCH, they do work if you arent lazy and you realize complacency kills and procrasitnation KILLS.
Try the mindfulnes tapes which are available off the internet and at the bookstores and audio books stores. Soak in a natural body of water, take chlorine free baths with salts and music and wacth yourself relax. Find cheap $29 massages. it works. I give yoy my word that it works. Try Yoga classes. Join Meetups. Dont focus every day on being ill, focus on being healthy.
And whatever you do, exercise, get sun every single day, have balance in your work, and sleep properly.
If you are willing to think well, despite all the injustices and pain you have been through and have seen that werent your fault, and are willing to take that path---and will play that healing music everywhere you go, and stay in your house (it doesnt have words, its just called Healing Music), your wife should support you or you should pack your bags and tell the unworthy bitch to screw herself.
Keep eating dead animal body parts, and living your life with little compassion, and a poor diet, and watch nothing change. people who give compassion deserve compassion.
The above things WORK. Its the people who are lazy or get away from them or WONT DO THEM EVERY SINGLE DAY OF THEIR LIFE that have the problems.
Chamomille tea 4 times a day also works as do amino acids like l-theanine, and Solgar Free Form Amino Acids. St Johns Wort tea has also helped me, as has calming tea.
I dont drink, but one drink is far better to relax you than any of that filth. All it is is distilled alcohol. More than one isnt good, but most dont need more than that to calm then anyway. Its those who rely on it and do more that have trouble. One drink a day never killed anyone.
With the other things, you wont even need that, if you have support, or find good things to do in life.
Do what you love, FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, and go for them. Even if you fail, you WILL get there. I did.
Doing what you love and having a reason for living and getting up each day is the most important thing aside form searching for good supprt , not people who threaten you, hurt you, or treat you with no respect.
Create a career on the side that aligns with what you want to contribute to this earth, and watch how beautifully happy that eventually makes you. In the end, that is why the hell you were put here, to bring your beauty, and talents, and contribution to the world.
Be lazy or do the above things.
Between the healing music all day, yoga classes, good meditation, the massages, the relaxing baths, soaking in natural bodies of water outside, having an interesting daily job or business of your dreams that you own on the side that contributes what you like and want to do for this nworld, calming teas, and thinking well (as Dr Weil says and its true) you will get there.
I did and I was worse off than any of you and was being destroyed by an organization that would put you in casket. None of you would have survived it. Im living proof one doesnt need meds if you walk the walk and realize your 2 choices in life and start being a man and be worthy of this life you were given.
YOU CAN DO IT!
I wish you everything you ever dream of, and love and happiness beyond your wildest dreams, but you need to be worthy of it, and work for it, and earn it. Good luck. And luck is BS. its all about the daily choice and keeping organized.
Getting a coupke of pets to keep themselves company when you arent there (non spayed cats or dogs (the natural way!) that can love each other and have companionship like you would want to be entitled to) CAN SAVE YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!!!!
Just dont get mad at them when they screw up as they dont know any better and are like children.
A pet and all the other stuff can really get you there. Pets help organize and structure your daily life and calm you to make you remember to do all the other things above that DO WORK AND ARE NOT PIE IN THE SKY BULLCRAP.
And they work FAR BETTER THAN than that filth and sewage you are putting in your body that was never meant to be there in the first place.
On my soul.
Live life and be happy and get rid of all the garbage around you that hurts you and watch things change. If a guy isnt willing to get in the drivers seat and take charge and want to be happy and live as intended, naturally--then he might as well not be here. You can do it. Dont let anyone lie to you and con you otherwise. Its called a choice. Either walk the walk--- or die.
Go live your life that way and worship those deviants. My wife and I live the right way and are happy and dont go near those demons.
12:07 AM
I have bipolar and have had it for many many years. I've been on so many cocktails it is unreal this is my cocktail right now Zyprexa ,Trazdone and Xanax I am on the strongest dose you can get. Does it work for me? the answer is easy NO. I stopped taking them they seemed to make my moods more intence I couldn't sleep I couldn't think my body shaked all the time I never sat still Now that they are out of my system I feel more at ease I still rapid cycle but I cope and control I am not saying this is the way for everybody this is just what is working for me . I am a artist so being a little wacked helps lol
3:37 AM
have been back on meds now for about 2 1/2 months. personally i can not tell any difference. this has been a battle since i was probably 11. being a divorced mother of 3 kids,barely making it, to not take meds is playing russian roulette every day when my eyes open. the anger, the rage , the self defeating emptiness that fills my heart, and it sickens me that my kids have seen this. i take the meds for them. if by any chance one of them grow up and they have this to deal with, they can know ,"hey mom did it! and it is ok, she made it , so can i!"
had no idea that there was such a site as this and very glad to find you. real bad at isolating and living in my own little world.
reading your words have made me laugh...cry....smile.....thank you it is nice to know i am not alone! bless you all.........
5:30 AM
Normal is just the average of all the world's abnormal people anyway.
9:31 AM
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