69 & 1/2 hours and counting
2 & a half more hours and I will have 3 whole days under my belt. Today I didnt have to eat as many suckers, but I have been shaking like crazy all day long. I know yall are probably sick of hearing about my cig battle, but its helping me to write about it.
I felt some depression coming on this morning. Its weird, I feel like I am almost grieving over a friend. Cigarettes have been my security blanket for a long time. If I was uncomfortable in a group, I could always escape to smoke...I'd smoke when I was nervous, when I was mad, when I was excited. I know it sounds really stupid, but theyve been a constant in my life for 14 years.
I was tempted bigtime tonight. Ive been cleaning my house, trying to stay busy and I found an old cigarette under my couch. Seriously, I wanted to scrape the dust off and light it up...but I survived and threw it away.
If I can make it tomorrow, I will have co-workers to keep me straight during the week. I dont know how Dean & D are doing, I havent talked to either of them since yesterday. Today was probably rough on all of us because we didnt have work to keep us busy.
Still truckin.....
4 Comments:
Wow, I have been so depressed and hiding that I have missed this! Keep it up. You can do it. Wow this really brings a smile to my face. You go girl!
10:43 PM
Keep working at it! Don't give up!
I've been working through crises of my own. While talking to a friend yesterday, all this shit about my mother surfaced. I could have started smoking right then and there....
9:21 AM
You CAN quit! Remember, one day at a time. GOOD LUCK!!
Peace - Pass it on!
~Brenda
9:46 AM
And we love reading about your battle with it...
So keep writing it out.
8:18 AM
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